THE LOVE LIFE!!!

22 Mar

I am so excited to be posting today! I have been waiting for the green light from God to chat about this since the first blog entry—in fact, it is what prompted me to start glimpsedglory—so believe me when I tell you that my entire body is smiling this morning.  I am absolutely giddy at the prospect of writing it down, imagining your faces as you read it, then grabbing hands and dancing down the streets of Jerusalem with you!

I sometimes get frustrated when I am plinking away on this keyboard trying to convey a sense of urgency about the subject at hand.  If you’ve chatted with me face-to-face when I have one of these lightning bolt moments hit my brain, you are very aware that I cannot get the words out of my mouth fast enough. And you’re also aware, maybe painfully so, that God has given me the supernatural ability to get a whole lot of talking done in only one breath. Now in my mind two things are accomplished with this rapid fire chatter:

  1. I’m able to get it all out before my train of thought pulls out of the station without me
  2. You’re kind of trapped until I’m finished.  (If blogs had emoticons, I would’ve put a smiley face at the end of #2.)

But no matter how fast I type I can’t dictate the speed with which you read nor does the blogosphere allow me to keep you hemmed in until my breath is gone.  So I’m just going to tell myself that since you came of your own volition, you’re in it for the long haul and you’ll read to the end.

God confirmed this message in the most beautiful and unmistakable way on January 20, 2013 at 3:45 p.m.  I know the exact date.  I even know the time of day.  It was that powerful and it was that life-changing.  I’m praying that it will be for you as well.  I have shared it with a few Sisters but I haven’t really felt Him give me permission to put it out there for you all to chew on until now.  But even as I sense His blessing and my spirit shakes with anticipation of who He will touch with this, I am asking Him to move me out of the way so it’s just you and Him meeting over this page today.

What I want to chat about in the next few paragraphs is dying to self.  If you don’t travel in evangelical Christian circles that phrase might not even be familiar to you.  To be honest, it has always felt like allusive Christianese to me as well.  I knew it was connected to crucifying my sinful nature and to choosing God’s will above myself but it was just kind of a concept that hung out there without a clear definition.  I knew it was something I was supposed to want to do but since I only had a vague comprehension of it, I certainly had no idea how to do it.  I had no problem understanding that I have behaviors and thoughts that are not Christ-like and they need to go.  So maybe “dying to self” meant to work toward eradicating those things that kept me from looking like my Savior.  Believe me, I could come up with an endless list of things I needed to change about myself, but was that really what it meant? Like a self-help or self-improvement kind of a thing?  Was that what the whole thing was about?  Me making changes in me to show that I loved Jesus?

Even though I operated that way for a quite a while, that definitely was not it. All that lead to was years of defeat believing that I had to pull myself up by the bootstraps and change.  I convinced myself that if I really appreciated what Christ had done for me I would grit my teeth and get rid of all the offensive ways in me.  I would live a holy life. But God just wouldn’t let my spirit settle there.  My mind kept returning to the day I confessed my need for Christ.  I had fully realized that I could do absolutely nothing without Him and yet, here I was, depending on myself to change myself.  It sounds confusing but that was the exact place I lived for many years.  Now don’t misunderstand.  God has poured His grace out on me and grown my faith by leaps and bounds.  He has lavished me with love beyond what I can describe to you but I have always had a kind of off feeling concerning this.  That’s one of the things I love about Him.  He knew I was thick-headed before time began and He chose to love me anyway.

Those are the days, months, and years leading to January 20, 2013. On that winter day, I was reading my Bible and had read about the sinfulness of jealousy, fits of rage, creating discord, gossip, slander, and arrogance.  And as I often do when I’m reading, I said aloud to God, “How am I ever going to get these things rooted out of me? How do I die to this stuff?” and I turned ahead in my Bible from 2 Corinthians to Ephesians.  I didn’t go there with purpose.  I just flipped the pages.  My eyes fell on verses I have read more times than I can count.

“Be imitators of God, therefore, as dearly loved children

and live a life of love, just as Christ loved us and gave himself

up for us as a fragrant offering and sacrifice to God.”

Ephesians 5:1-2 (NIV, 1984)

Read it again, considering the topic at hand.  Do you see the answer that He gave me?  Oh how He takes my breath away!  After years of wondering and asking the question, “Lord, what does it mean to die to self?,” that day –January 20, 2013—He made it clear.  I practically heard His voice, “My dear child, you do not die, you choose to live like me. You choose to love.”  And in that one instance, years of fog began to roll away and it all started to come together.  Being crucified with Christ is being brought to life in love.  GOD IS LOVE.  If I live in LOVE, if I surrender every decision to LOVE, if I give over all I am to LOVE everything else falls into place.  It’s not about what I don’t do, it’s about what I do, do.

Stick with me on this.  It isn’t about not being jealous of another.  It’s about loving someone so much that you only want them to receive good things.  It’s not about refraining from gossip; it’s about loving others too much to hurt them that way. It’s not about abstaining from arrogance; it’s about so loving another’s heart that you can’t be anything less than humble toward them. Oh, do you see it?

The focus is not on the death.

The focus is on the life!

The LOVE LIFE.

So to me, it doesn’t get any plainer or any better than that and I must share the good news with someone.  I began to tell Brett about it as fast as I could – because he can’t get away from me (another place I would insert a smiley emoticon if I could) repeating the phrase LOVE LIFE to him over and over again.  I cried when I was telling him because I knew that even though I didn’t have my mind fully wrapped around it, God was going to show me!  And then, as so often happens, doubt began to appear at the corners of my mind. I started thinking, “Maybe I am making too much of this.  What if I am misreading this?” And at 3:30 p.m., partly to take my mind off the questions my brain was formulating and partly because I hoped she would call and chat it all out with me, I sent my daughter a text:

“I can’t wait until I talk to you next because I think God showed me the secret of the universe and I am trying to take in what my mind can get.”

Her reply at 3:38 p.m.

“I can’t wait to hear it! I love you Momma!”

There was not going to be a discussion right now.  So, I sat there holding my phone and wondering:

“Lord, does “dying to self” mean living to walk and to talk the Love Life?  Is living in the Spirit living in Love?  To be filled with the Spirit, is to be filled with you.  You are LOVE.  To walk in the Spirit, is to walk with you.  You are LOVE.  This is it!  Not death, but the LOVE LIFE.  Lord, am I making too much of this?”

Please remember, I had not shared a single syllable of this with my girl.  She was 1200 miles away from me and I thought we had finished texting. But at 3:45 p.m. my daughter sent one more text and she attached a picture.  Both are below:

“Momma, I just finished painting this and thought you’d like to see it.”

"LOVE SPEAKS"

“LOVE SPEAKS”

Oh Dear Ones, how the Creator of the Universe longs for us to get the message!  He does not call us to death – HE CALLS US TO LIFE.  Specifically, He calls us to live the LOVE LIFE.  When we LOVE, we imitate our GOD and we walk as JESUS did!  Living the LOVE LIFE is the essence of being holy because He is holy (Leviticus 11:45; 1 Peter 1:16). He has not given us the death sentence of never ending self-improvement.  He has called us to live like we have never lived before—unashamedly in the embrace of LOVE.  Oh Sister, will you live for that today?  Will you surrender to that today?  Will you give up your “pull-myself-up-by-the-bootstraps” living and fully embrace LOVE today?  I pray it is so. I pray it for you and I pray it for me. Oh Girlfriend, let’s glimpse Glory!

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Resolved to Involve

15 Mar

Today’s blog post will not be for the faint of heart nor the person with limited reading time.  The more I thought the more that poured out on the page so if you are not in the mood for some real transparency along with blood and guts honesty you might want to wait until the next entry.  You see I am kicking around the idea that I am believing the lie that if I appear to be anything other than self-sufficiently serene then I am less than the Christian woman I “should” be.  And when I kick around an idea for me, I usually take the liberty of kicking it around for you too. I’m quite certain that I am going to have a difficult time articulating what I have been pondering so I am praying that God will take my muddled thinking and turn it into something that really speaks to your heart because I think, for all of our differences—jobs, spouses, children, hobbies—this may be something that we have in common.

There is a question that I’ve heard myself ask quite a few times over the last few weeks when I have been encouraging others who seemed to be hesitating to share and offering all kinds of disclaimers when their struggles finally fell out of their mouths.  The question I asked was this:

“When we make our trials seem small,

do we inadvertently make the One

who sustains us through them seem small?”

The sweet sisters I was chatting with were afraid to share what they were going through because they didn’t want their honesty to be misperceived as whining, complaining, or not trusting in the goodness of God. I’ll be the first one to say it’s always necessary to examine our hearts, but I’ll also be the one at the head of line shouting that God gave you those sisters at your side to do life with—Don’t steal their blessing!

Apparently, God allowed me to pose this question and explain it with such gusto to my friends so I could really feel the impact of the words when He brought them home to roost.  Funny how He does that; lets me think I’m conducting the class and then shows me that I’m the student in the corner with the cone shaped hat sitting on top of her head.

I know that I should be in party mode right now.  Life really is good.  Britt has returned to Florida and is absolutely gushing about the trustworthiness and sweetness of her God.  Brett has been released from the hospital and, though the whole thing is new to us, we are both working hard to make the new tube and accompanying equipment feel at home here on Lakeside Drive.  So, you would think that the celebration would be in full swing?  Well if you did .  . . you would be wrong.  Brett is processing all he has been through as men do (by that I mean in a way that no one without a Y chromosome can possibly understand) and I am processing things the way I do (and by that I mean in a way that is perfectly rational and to be expected).  I’m being humorous but suffice to say, the “process of processing”, has been anything but. This is where the blood and guts are going to start spilling so if you are thrown by human frailty now is when you will want to go check your e-mail or update your facebook status.

Ok,  if you’ve decided to keep reading here it is:  I know that I should be celebrating and walking on air right now, but instead I am cranky, fatigued, and emotionally overwhelmed.  Someone commented to me about Brett’s time in the hospital being a “mini-vacation” for me.  Another person thought it may have given me a chance to get some rest.  No, I was not on vacation nor did I get any rest.  I am still exhausted.  My nerves are frazzled and my body physically aches from sleeping on that hard couch-type deal at the end of Brett’s bed.   On top of those things, I am embarrassed because I am not responding to the situation with graciousness and a quiet spirit. In fact, I think it would be safe to say graciousness and a quiet spirit are not even residing in the same county I am.

I can hear my body language speaking volumes and my mouth isn’t being too quiet either.  I’d like to be kind, to be sweet, and to be upbeat but instead I am standing at the intersection of self-absorbed and cantankerous with my hands stuffed in my pockets refusing to move.  And, as if all of these things needed an exclamation point added to them, anytime I am by myself this great conglomeration of feelings decides to leak out my eyes and slide down my face.

But still, nearly every person that has made contact has received the same type of response . . . . “We’re getting settled in” . . .  “Brett has been through a lot” . . . “Our own bed was nice” . . .  all of those responses are true, but they aren’t exactly honest.  They don’t invite anybody in and they certainly don’t let anyone know the battle raging in my heart.  If you had been one of those people, how would you have prayed for me after we talked/texted/messaged?  Would you have prayed for me at all or just thought things were swell?

In comparison to others I know, the challenges on Biddinger Boulevard are small.  I have not lost my child. I have not stared cancer in the face.  I have not wrestled with the decisions surrounding the care of an aging parent.  I have not . . . . . you fill in the blank with your personal heartache.  I have not walked through the fiery trials God has called you to endure.  And still I wonder, even though the specifics of our challenges are different, might our responses be the same?   What in the world has convinced us that we must cloak the depth of our need in order to be strong Christian women?

I’m certain that the answer to that question is as widely varied as we are.  Your answer will be different than mine and both of our answers will be different than the sister reading at her computer down the street.  But this is what I’m sure of, no matter what has convinced us of this, IT IS A LIE!  God has not only given us Himself, but He has given us others to wear the hands, the feet, and the heart of Christ in our midst.  He has resolved to involve!  He has sent you friends to fight the battle, see the fatigue, and to lift you up as you walk through it all.  It’s Who He is today and it’s who He was yesterday.

Moses said to Joshua, “Choose some of our men and go out to fight the Amalekites. Tomorrow I will stand on top of the hill with the staff of God in my hands. “So Joshua fought the Amalekites as Moses had ordered, and Moses, Aaron and Hur went to the top of the hill. As long as Moses held up his hands, the Israelites were winning, but whenever he lowered his hands, the Amalekites were winning. When Moses’ hands grew tired, they took a stone and put it under him and he sat on it. Aaron and Hur held his hands up—one on one side, one on the other—so that his hands remained steady till sunset. So Joshua overcame the Amalekite army with the sword.  Exodus 17:9-13

God didn’t expect Moses to pretend the battle was small or hide his need.  And He didn’t expect Moses to just grit his teeth and gut it out.  God knew the magnitude of the battle and how hard it would be so He sent Moses’ friends to the top of the hill with him.  When he got tired, they were there, exactly where God had called them to be doing the good work He had prepared in advance for them to do.  They didn’t think Moses was less of a man of God because he got tired and his arms grew weak.  They brought him a place to rest and took up their posts—one on one side and one on the other—and they entered the battle together.

Girlfriend, don’t turn away the ones God has resolved to involve in your life.  Let them know the fight is too much, that it has been going on too long, and the view from the top of the hill is overwhelming.  Don’t be afraid to tell them that your arms are tired and you just need to sit down for a while.  Beloved, our trial is not small nor is the One who sustains us through them. He has planned since before time began to send our us our “Aaron” and our “Hur” to give us a place to rest, to take up their posts– one on one side and one on the other—and march into battle with us. Let’s not choose to go alone.

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The Warrior on My Wall

8 Mar

I arrived at the hospital thmeandmylovefortyeightis morning a little after 8 a.m. and was greeted with, “Good morning Gorgeous” before my man had even seen my face.  It was the same voice I heard say to me yesterday when I entered his room, “I love that I recognize that purposeful stride coming down the hall.”  Isn’t he amazing?  With all that he is going through (I typed “walking through” first but then thought better of it–LOL) he still notices me.

If anyone were to have a justification for being self-absorbed it might be Brett.  He has been through much since his accident in 1993 but few things have been as trying as the last few months.  In late August he developed a large growth under his skin and it has spiraled downward from that point.  It moved from a hard mass to a large open surface wound and steadily worked its way further into his skin.  It has required periods of 24/7 bed confinement and stolen much of his very active life.  On Monday, he will have extensive surgery to remove the dead tissue and hopefully, clear the path for his physical healing to begin.

Sisters, I so wish you could have watched this process unfold with me.  He did not shrink back from the challenge but became all the more determined to be a great warrior, a true Nehemiah man, in the heavenlies.

Therefore I stationed some of the people behind the lowest points of the wall

at the exposed places, posting them by families,

with their swords, spears and bows.

After I looked things over, I stood up and said to the nobles,

the officials and the rest of the people,

“Don’t be afraid of them.

Remember the Lord, who is great and awesome,

and fight for your families, your sons and your daughters,

your wives and your homes.” 

When our enemies heard that we were aware of their plot

and that God had frustrated it,

we all returned to the wall, each to our own work.

Nehemiah 4:13-15

See, while I may speak “thick-headed” my man speaks the language of the WARRIOR.  Case in point:  I was studying Revelation and gushing all over him about being the Bride of Christ dressed in fine white linen and he listened politely.  Then, I got to the next description of those dressed in fine white linen and the polite listening stopped.  He sat taller in his chair and listened intently as I read aloud about the armies of the Lord following the rider who is “Faithful and True” into battle.  It was total participation. You could see the light in his eyes and the engagement of his heart.  He was absolutely thrilled at the prospect.

That’s who my man is.  Behind the spine that won’t cooperate with his brain anymore, past the legs that will not listen to the signal to move, beyond the hands that refuse to obey his command . . HE IS A WARRIOR.  He is a protector.  He is about the business of listening to the Commander and standing guard at the wall so that his family and friends can safely go to their own work.  Every day, as surely as you rise from your bed and check off the tasks on your to-do-list, my man arises, grabs his sword and takes up his station. Oh how I praise God for the commitment He has given Brett to fight.

And this morning my heart was filled afresh with love for him as I realized that this hospitalization is not a change in mission for Brett or even a delay in his Kingdom work, it is a promotion.  He has been so faithful with his section of the wall that God is entrusting him with a new and larger assignment.  He is sending him deeper into enemy territory to stand beside nobles, officials, and people he does not know. But God knows them and He is sending Brett to fight for them.

And what has so totally convinced me that this is the case, that God has expanded his territory?  It was his first request of me this morning. He wanted to know if I would help him with the computer.  He was loving the verse of the day on biblegateway.com and wanted to post it as his facebook status.  Consider the battle fatigue this warrior should be experiencing as he has been literally wounded in the fight, and yet, his focus is on reaching those suffering on the battlefield or trapped behind enemy lines “in any trouble.”

[Praise to the God of All Comfort ]

Praise be to the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ,

the Father of compassion and the God of all comfort,

who comforts us in all our troubles,

so that we can comfort those in any trouble

with the comfort we ourselves receive from God

2 Corinthians 1:3-4 NIV

So, I tell my Warrior all that God has chatted with me about as he was sleeping and as I watch the smile spread across his face two things come to my mind.  First, I think, “Lord, give me that kind of humble tenacity. Let me be so consumed with you that I am willing to combat crawl with my legs dragging behind me to any place you call me on the battlefield.”  And second, I give Him praise with all that I am that He has stationed this mighty Warrior on my wall.meandmylovefortyeight1

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He Will Not Let You Go Alone

6 Mar

How thankful I am for God today.  How desperately I seek His comfort.  How I praise Him that before time began He planned to meet my every need.  I thank Him that He never fails to show Himself involved in all the intimate details of life and I pray for eyes to see Him as well as a heart that seeks to embrace Him.  Although this morning has been filled with much prayer and girding up for the battle that lay ahead, it has also been filled with a sense of excitement. While I have no idea what challenges the battlefield holds today, I feel a surge of adrenaline as I hear my head tell my heart that no matter what, my God is bigger. And I visit a favorite website and see the following words staring back at me:

“Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous.

Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged,

for the Lord your God will be with you wherever you go.”

Joshua 1:9

And I praise Him for His love for me.

The health issue that has been plaguing Brett since late August is wearing a new face and it is an ugly one.  My heart is breaking for him as he fights against his own body and appears, in this one area, to be losing. He has fought the despair of illness and experienced setback after setback and through it all, he has remained faithful in his desire to believe God more.  He has not faltered in his determination to be matured in this trial and he purposefully enters the Throne Room day after day in intercessory prayer.  Oh how I love that man.  Believe me when I tell you that even though he lives his life seated in a wheelchair, he stands head and shoulders above most I know.  He perseveres. He endures.  He suffers.  But he does NOT waver.

And as I pray for him, I am keenly aware that my continuing faith in God’s goodness, Brett’s continuing faith in God’s goodness, has little to do with us and everything to do with Him.  As I wrote in the previous post, He refuses to let me be satisfied with myself.  With my limited perception. With my oh so small faith. And so like the man in Mark 9:24, I have a decision to make as I watch the one I love suffer.  I have come face-to-face with a situation I cannot solve or change; it is beyond me.  It is not, however, beyond Him.  So I press my eyes closed and I ask God to help me overcome my unbelief.  I ask Him to reveal any lingering doubt I may have about His goodness and I firmly determine that this day I will not waver in my belief in the goodness of God.  I will stand tall in His armor and declare for all the heavenlies to hear that I will not shrink back nor change my mind concerning Him. And again I feel the rush of excitement and the thrill of belief because He has prompted me to stand firm in Him and I have obeyed.  I am at once emboldened and humbled as I realize the depth of my need for Him and the power with which He will undoubtedly meet it.

Sister, our God longs to bless His children and if the blessing is not immediate, then there is purpose in the wait.  May I just encourage you to hang on and trust Him?  May I exhort you to love Him through it all and to rely on His love for you?   I guarantee you, based on the authority of His Word, it will not be an exercise in futility.

And therefore the Lord [earnestly] waits [expecting, looking, and longing]

to be gracious to you;

and therefore He lifts Himself up, that He may have mercy on you

and show loving-kindness to you.

For the Lord is a God of justice.

Blessed (happy, fortunate, to be envied) are all those

who [earnestly] wait for Him, who expect and look and long for Him

[for His victory, His favor, His love, His peace,

His joy, and His matchless, unbroken companionship]!

Isaiah 30:18 (Amplified Bible)

The blessing will come. The need will be met.  The tear will be wiped away and the hurt will be healed.  Dear One, you are loved by Him and He is aching for the day He is allowed to make your faith sight and to fully reveal His favor to you.  Jesus knows that it is hard to be us.  He knows how limiting it is to live inside our dying skin.  And He knows what it is like to wait for the healing, to trust for the blessing, and to fully rely on the love of the Father. Imagine the agony He felt as He hung on the cross. . . . . .  waiting, trusting, relying.  He knows Beloved, Oh how He knows.

Our Savior is not far removed from our needs or distant from our hurts.   We need not be afraid. We need not be discouraged.  He has walked in our shoes and laid down footsteps of determined faith. We need only to believe and follow Him.

Posted from Blodgett Hospital 1:17 a.m.

Posted from Blodgett Hospital 1:17 a.m.

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He Will Not Let You Settle . . . For You

27 Feb

Once again this morning I find myself at that place of awe, humility and wonder at the love of God.  Believe me when I tell you that the day did not start out that way.  I assure you, and if you could chat with Brett he would be quick to confirm for you, that I began my morning quite consumed with myself. (Check the comments on the side because he may confirm without your asking!)  In fact, I would say I have spent the last several days wallowing around in “all that is Bunny”. Praise God that He wants more for me “than me” and refuses to abandon me to my own mind.  Read that last sentence carefully.  I am not saying that God wants more for me than I WANT for me, I am saying that God wants more for me “than me.”  He knows that if I am to live, move, and find my being in Him, I have to live beyond myself.

If you have any propensity to become too introspective or self-absorbed, you’ve experienced the tremendous sense of relief that follows a readjustment of your vision.  You’re familiar with the freedom that comes from being set loose from yourself and you know what it means to have the weight of “you” removed from your shoulders.  Unfortunately, if you’re well acquainted with those things you are also in a tighter relationship than you want to be with what I am going to call the “consumption cycle.”

Your “consumption cycle” will be triggered by different things than mine but I firmly believe that once it is set in motion, we will pack our bags and travel hand in hand down the same well-worn path.  Maybe your consumption cycle begins with pouring your love and energy into preparing a meal for your family only to have it go totally unnoticed by a single soul.  Not a thank you, not a “good job Mom”, nothing.  Funny thing is that most often that kind of thing doesn’t sting your heart at all.  But this time, it hurts and your mind begins to chat with your heart about how unappreciated you are.  You wonder if you are significant and worse, a part of you believes that you are not.

Perhaps your consumption cycle starts its journey in the workplace.  You never complain about the workload, always go above and beyond the necessary task, and still, it seems as if you’re invisible.  Just another number, plugging away and easily replaced.  Your brain begins to tell you that you are nothing special and pretty soon you are listening to every word.  You hear the refrain and your security is shaken.

Or it might be that your trigger lies much closer to home? Hidden somewhere at the back of your heart in a big steamer trunk marked “the past” are memories that periodically try to crawl out of the mothballs surrounding them. Something occurs and you find yourself engulfed by old emotions with a nearly uncontrollable desire to disappear.  Everything in your head screams that you are unfit and unacceptable to serve Him.

              • Significance
              • Security
              • Acceptance

Those three things are as important to our souls as food is to our bodies.

I certainly join you in praising God if you have come to the point in your faith journey where you consistently look to God for your worth, but if you vacillate now and then and just reading the words makes you wince a little, I want you to know, YOU ARE NOT ALONE.   If no one around you will admit that they do not have it all together, Sister, you come have coffee with me and I promise you, you will leave with absolute assurance that you have company in your struggles.  Even though the times are fewer and farther between than they used to be, there are still times when my mind turns on itself and I simply must choose to know what I know regardless of what my eyes perceive or my heart feels.

The sense of being less than you were created to be is nothing new.  Adam and Eve were created with their significance, their security, and their acceptance intact. They chose to sin and for the first time they experienced fear, isolation, and alienation.  This is the heritage that they passed on to their descendants.  Girlfriend, that’s us.  We’re the ones they deeded that property to.  I don’t know about you, but that is not a place I want to live and praise His Name, that isn’t the piece of land He has chosen for me. He died so that my boundary lines would fall in pleasant places and indeed, because of Christ, I have a beautiful inheritance. Those who have accepted Jesus are seated with Him in the heavenly realms and they are, without a doubt, significant, secure and accepted and Beloved, He says it often enough and plainly enough that even those who only speak “thick-headed” can understand.

He doesn’t say only once that in Christ you are fully accepted. 

He repeats Himself.

You are His child.

You are His friend.

You belong to Him.

He doesn’t limit His announcement of your security through Jesus. 

He says it again and again.

You are anointed and sealed by Him.

You cannot be separated from His love.

You are protected.

And He doesn’t restrain Himself in proclaiming the significance the

Savior has purchased for you.

You are His dwelling place.

You are His workmanship.

You are filled with His power.

See, no matter how many times I succumb to the “consumption cycle” I cannot change the truth concerning the redeemed of God.  He will not abandon me to myself.  So until my faith becomes sight and I truly possess my Promised Land,  I pray for the desire to live beyond myself and I praise Him that He wants more for me “than me.”  Girlfriend, do not settle for yourself!

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The Resolve to Reign

20 Feb

In the last post I said I had had two sad coffee dates.  I told you about the cup I shared with the positive thinking gal who quoted Beatrix Potter and we brewed together about the very small “idk god” most of us have bowed to at one time or another.  But I didn’t say much about the meeting with Samuel.  Truth is our dining room table was crowded that morning because Samuel didn’t come alone.  He brought the elders of the Hebrew nation with him and soon Saul had filled a cup and taken a seat as well (1 Samuel 7-9).  We can’t relive all the action or significant events leading up to this point in Israel’s history because that would push the length way past the comments column, but to me this specific moment is one of the saddest in all the Bible.

Even if you are not an Old Testament enthusiast, you know about the miracles God performed in the lives of His children.  You know that He showed Himself mightier than any god Egypt could conjure, filled the hands of the Israelites with treasure, and parted the Red Sea for their escape.  He fed them in the wilderness, never allowed their clothes to wear out or their feet to swell in their wanderings, and He set the most beautiful of all the land aside for them. Over and over again God showed them who He was and confirmed His character by what He did.   Every battle He won for them, every promise He fulfilled for them seemed to echo the Divine invitation to KNOW Him.   And with each wonder He performed and each miracle He accomplished the breath of God announced . . . “I AM Love.  I AM Mercy.  I  AM Faithful.  Know Me.  Know Me.”

That’s why we’ve got to hear His heart of love when He tells the Israelites, “Don’t chase after those other gods, don’t offer yourself to them, don’t give them your love.  You don’t even know them.”  Now  that’s a Marilyn summarization/ paraphrase of a whole bunch of verses throughout the Old Testament , but the message of LOVE is still His.

We always have to be mindful of these truths:

  • He does not need us to remain true to Him for Him.
  • He does not need us to choose to follow Him for Him.
  • He does not need us to serve Him for Him.

He does not need us to . . . . . to anything.  Here’s the truth Girlfriend.  It’s you who needs Him, not the other way around.

 “The God who made the world and everything in it is the Lord of heaven and earth and does not live in temples built by hands. And he is not served by human hands, as if he needed anything, because he himself gives all men life and breath and everything else. From one man he made every nation of men, that they should inhabit the whole earth; and he determined the times set for them and the exact places where they should live. God did this so that men would seek him and perhaps reach out for him and find him, though he is not far from each one of us.  ‘For in him we live and move and have our being.’  Acts 17:24-28

That’s the truth today and that was the truth for the Israelites.  So with all that Divine Love stirring your heart, imagine how it must have pierced the heart of God to have His people flat out reject Him as their King.  The same Nation that had declared that “The Lord will reign forever and ever” was now announcing that they no longer wanted Him to occupy the throne.

So all the elders of Israel gathered together and came to Samuel at Ramah. They said to him, “You are old, and your sons do not walk in your ways; now appoint a king to lead us, such as all the other nations have.” But when they said, “Give us a king to lead us,” this displeased Samuel; so he prayed to the Lord. And the Lord told him: “Listen to all that the people are saying to you; it is not you they have rejected, but they have rejected me as their king.   1 Samuel 8:4-7

 Feel the grief that must have washed over His heart.  These were the ones He had chosen.  The ones He had saved.  The ones He had shown His glory.  They were the ones He loved.  He had chosen to be their King so they would stand out, stand above, and stand apart from all the other nations.  He had distinguished them with His Presence and guided them with His Glory.  And now they were willingly discarding their holy distinction for disgrace.  They were demanding to return to the very state of servitude God had delivered them from.  How could anyone taste the love and freedom of the Divine and choose to abandon it?

Since I have confessed to you that my love language is thick-headed, it should come as no surprise that I love what seems to be the denseness of the Israelite people.  I am so grateful that they made the same mistakes over and over so that God could keep repeating Himself because, if nothing else, it gave Him good practice for displaying the unlimited patience He would need when He welcomed me into the Kingdom.  It’s so easy to look at the Israelites with disdain and say, “How could they?” until we really take the time to look intently at their actions. If you’re at all like me, what you see is yourself staring back.

God has done miraculous things for me and worked wonders beyond measure in my life.  I’m certain the same is true for you.  I’m also certain that just as surely as He set the Israelites free from the ruler who had placed the yoke of slavery upon them that He has set you and I free as well. He delivered us from the dominion of darkness and took our yoke of sin. And in all of this, He has whispered to our hearts  in the same real and tangible ways that He did to the Israelites, “Know Me. Know Me.”  And praise His Name, His grace led us to declare that He and He alone would be our King.  He would sit on the throne of our lives and His Presence would distinguish us from those with other rulers.  And then, just like the Israelites, we decided to trade our King for a small “k” king like everyone else had.

Remember the sadness we felt as we pondered the grief of God.  Would He not experience the same heartbreak in this instance?  We are the ones He has chosen.  We are the ones He has saved.  We are those that He has shown His glory.  We are the ones that He loves.  And in spite of Everything He Is, all too often we mimic our Old Testament forerunners by choosing to discard our holy distinction and blend with the world.

This is the part that really hits me.  We seem to believe now, the Israelites seemed to believe then, that we have some control over who is actually sitting on the Throne.  Doesn’t that strike you odd?  God has always been on His Throne, He always will be, and He is today.  Rather we choose to acknowledge His position or not, does not change the fact.  It seems like everything we study brings us back to the same point.  God cannot be changed by us, but we can certainly be changed by Him.  Let me say that again.  God cannot be changed by us, but we can certainly be changed by Him.  When we accept Christ as our Savior, we bow to the One, True King and acknowledge His position on the Throne.   It is we who benefit from His reign in our lives because it is we who are changed when we live knowing that He is enthroned.  When the King reigns — we change.

Oh Girlfriend, your destiny is not to blend in!  Don’t settle for the ordinary when the Extraordinary died to give you more.  You were meant to walk stronger, serve harder, and love deeper.  Your King has given you life to the full.  Keep Him on the Throne and live it well Sister!  Live it well!

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The Resolve to ROAR!

13 Feb

I had two sad coffee dates this weekend.  One was with Samuel in chapters 7 and 8 of the first book bearing his name and the other was with some gal who had written an article on the power of positive thinking.  Funny thing is that the same story was being told by both people.  Both were recounting our desire to trade our limitless God for a weak replica we constrain by the limits of our finite minds.   The article on the power of positive thinking featured this quote from Unitarian, Beatrix Potter:

 “Believe in a great power silently working all things for good . . . and never mind the rest.”

Now in the most general terms, Unitarians do not believe in the Trinity nor do they accept Jesus as the Son of God.  They reject the inerrancy of the Bible as well as the doctrine of original sin.  Essentially, when you put Beatrix Potter’s words together with her beliefs, there isn’t one thing “positive” about it. To me, she’s saying you pick and choose who and what you want god to be and then place your faith in the willy nilly nature you have decided he should have.

I can’t speak for you but I know that the god I constructed prior to accepting Christ had no desire to hold me accountable for anything and always assured me that its benevolent nature would overlook any indiscretion on my part.  In fact, there could be no indiscretion because the standard for acceptable behavior was, to say the least, set up on a sliding scale.  Oh yes, I might like to have believed that the small “g” god I conjured up was silently working behind the scenes to make my life everything I wanted it to be but in all honesty, trusting something that was subject to my every whim was hard work.  I can say with certainty that any god who would be and do whoever and whatever I decided it would be and do, might be manageable but it definitely would not be trustworthy.  And while I might decide that the god of my imagination would work all things out for my good, you know me well enough by now to know that I would never have imagined it to be silent.

Now, if you were to consider the details of the gods Beatrix Potter and I had created, they might seem quite different.   She would’ve chosen what parts of the Biblical God she would contort to build her shadow ruler and I would have chosen mine.  But, it is the differences in our creations that reveal the identical nature of their cores.  Peel away the “my god would never this” and “my god is always that” and at the stripped down center you will find  . . . .SELF.  I want a god who behaves and fits into the box of the moment.  I want a god I am comfortable with and can control.    My god will serve the purposes I appoint when I appoint it to.  But most importantly, my god will serve me.  Perhaps I am wrong but I think that all of us have worshiped to some degree at that same self-constructed, self-centered altar.

I recently had a chance to chat on fb with a friend and we ended up messaging back and forth about this very thing.  It isn’t what we started out chatting about, but eventually the conversation turned in that direction and once it did, it didn’t seem as if I could leave it just hanging there.  I don’t usually talk about things that might be perceived as controversial through fb, texts, or even letters because you can’t hear the person’s tone of voice or see their body language so it’s too easy to misinterpret things.  But since a face-to-face or even phone-to-phone chat was not likely to take place in the near future, I plunged ahead, typed the question and clicked the send button.

  • “Do you believe Jesus when He says I am THE way, THE truth, and THE life or have you begun embracing the idea that there are many ways to God?”
  • Message Seen 11:48 a.m.  The answer:
    • “I do believe in God (their use of a capital “g” not mine) but I do not believe in religion or Christianity.  So to be honest I don’t really know how to answer your question.”

My heart was beating hard at this point.  I love my friend.  So I rephrased the question hoping that the response I received would assure me that they simply hadn’t understood and, beyond that, they would clearly tell me that of course they believed in Jesus.  I tentatively typed and pressed send again.

  • “Maybe you have answered my question in saying that you do not believe in Christianity—which means follower of Christ.  Have you decided that you no longer believe that Jesus is the Son of God, willingly died for your sins on the cross, and was raised to life so that you could be reconciled to and live in the Presence of God the Father?”

I sat holding my breath and staring at the computer.

  • Message Seen 11:57 a.m.  And the response hit the screen like a hard right cross to the chin.
    • “Correct. I do not believe that.”

I’m not sure how you indicate long, heart sinking, wish it hadn’t happened silence in this genre.  I’m new at the whole blogging thing.  But after a very definite pause I  finally found my fingers, typed the question and hit the send button again.

  • “Who is the god you believe in?”

The reply that came:

  • “Idk.  I just know that there is someone greater than me that created me.  I believe God accepts everyone for who they are.  And I believe if you are a good person you will be rewarded.  The Christian God will let a rapist or a pedophile into heaven as long as they repent and believe in Jesus.  That is not right in my eyes.”

That response makes my heart ache and my eyes sting with tears.  And yet, the general description sounds all too familiar.  If you think back to your bC (before Christ) days, wouldn’t you agree that we have all worshiped the “idk” god?  The one we made up.   That we were comfortable with.  Perhaps we said, like my friend, that “my god” is accepting of everyone—implying that the One, True, Living God is not.  And then, in our next breath, we accuse the same God we just implied was too judgmental, of being too soft on those we have decided do not deserve forgiveness.    We say that “our god” will reward good people but we have reserved the right to define who is or who is not good.  And if we’re honest, our definition of good used ourselves as the gold standard.   We created a god who would not challenge us to be anything more than our sin nature desired to be.  The god we constructed in our minds behaved himself.  He loved who we wanted him to love, forgave who we wanted him to forgive, and threw lightning bolts at those we decided deserved them.  The god we were serving was small.  It fit inside our finite notions of who and what God should be.  If we want a god that manageable, that limited, that controllable, we will never be able to accept the truth of the God who gave His One and Only Son to save us.  Because He is none of those things.  He is God, there is no other.

I am the Lord, and there is no other;
apart from me there is no God.
I will strengthen you,
though you have not acknowledged me,
  so that from the rising of the sun
to the place of its setting
men may know there is none besides me.
I am the Lord, and there is no other.

Isaiah 45:5-6

GOD is enormous.  He is limitless.  He is LOVE and He knows no bounds.  His beauty, His majesty, and His splendor are so fierce that they cannot be contained.  His majesty erupts and the heavens spring into existence.  His beauty explodes and the stars find their places.  His splendor bursts forth and the seas are hemmed in.   He is unending love and fearsome holiness. He is beyond what we can conceive or imagine and He has chosen to summon us by name and claim us as His own.  In the words C.S. Lewis used in The Lion, the Witch, and the Wardrobe to describe Aslan,  “He’s good, but He’s not tame.”  Sister, your God is anything but tame.  From my perspective, He who called forth the Lion of Judah is absolutely WILD!  We simply do not have the capacity to comprehend His limitless love, perfect passion, or uncompromising holiness.  And still . . . and still . . .  He says to you, “You are the apple of my eye!”  Beloved,  . . . you’re His favorite!  The Wild One is wild about you!

And unlike Beatrix Potter’s god, He is not quiet about it.  Her silent god who works behind the scenes disintegrates in the presence of the Holy One who announces for all to hear that He works for the good of all those who love Him.  No, God is not silent concerning His love for you.  He confirmed it from the manger and shouted it from the Cross.   Girlfriend, do NOT limit God to what you can imagine.  Give Him permission to show you more, to push you to be more, to call you nearer.  Beloved, the Wild One is calling you to raise your eyes, open your heart and hear the roar!

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The Resolve to Go Beyond

7 Feb

One thing I know to be true about myself is that I rarely tell a short story.  Especially when it comes to sharing about whatever thing God is doing around me at the moment.  I try to keep things brief but the details are significant and, to my way of thinking, you don’t really get the full impact if I don’t share each and every one. Hence, Side Note #2 to be read in a whisper on the last post.

Everything God does and shows us is so worth talking about to me.  I’m up front about my verbosity.  I always tell (or warn – you pick the verb) the sweet Sisters who attend my Bible studies that “I am a woman who loves to do two things:  study the Word and talk.”  And by the end of our weeks together, if they have learned nothing else, they have learned that the second part of that statement is true.  In fact, I was blessed to have my niece in attendance the very first time I introduced and expounded on material I had written myself.  When we left study, I said to her, “Sis, can you believe I talked for almost an hour?”  She didn’t skip a beat as she very matter-of-factly replied, “Oh yeah Aunt Bunny.  I wasn’t surprised.”

And, as you’ve probably noted by now, this blog does not deviate from my pattern.  For those of you who have been following since the first post, have you noticed that the number of comments that can be seen down the side has grown?  It isn’t just that there are more comments to show.  Nope.  There’s this widget in the blog set up that I can use to select how many comments are visible at a time.  It ranges from 5 to 15.  The first post I set the widget to display 5 comments.  But then on the second post I noticed that the text went past the comments and made the post look a little wordy.  Did I shorten the post?  No!  I moved the number of comments displayed to 10.  On the third post, I talked long enough that 10 didn’t do it anymore, and I had to change the widget to display 15 comments.  But 15 is the maximum that can be displayed so now I can’t even create the illusion that I can be succinct.  I think that’s why Twitter doesn’t hold any appeal for me.  Who can say anything in 140 characters or less?

While I’m not certain that wordiness is a spiritual gift, I am definitely thankful that God has blessed me with an enthusiasm for the things He has to say and an eye that often sees His intimate involvement in the everyday.    It might be that I appreciate those things so much because it’s so far from where this rebellious heart began.  I totally identify with the words God spoke through the pen of the Apostle Paul in 1 Timothy.

The grace of our Lord was poured out on me abundantly, along with the faith and love that are in Christ Jesus.  Here is a trustworthy saying that deserves full acceptance: Christ Jesus came into the world to save sinners—of whom I am the worst. But for that very reason I was shown mercy so that in me, the worst of sinners, Christ Jesus might display his unlimited patience as an example for those who would believe on him and receive eternal life. 1 Timothy 1:14-16

I often tell friends who are praying for someone close to them to surrender to Christ, “Look at me and have hope.  I’m tangible proof that God never gives up and no one is beyond His reach.” See, my life confirms that God reaches out and changes hearts regardless of our sin history. And I know, that as blessed as I am to be called by Him in the here and now, God has an inheritance kept in heaven for me beyond what I can conceive or imagine.  How can I be so confident of this?  How do I absolutely know it to be true?  Because it is who my God has always been and what my God has always done.

When I was little I used to love to read those big, hard covered Bible story books.  I think there were 12 of them.  The collection included the accounts of Noah, Moses, Joseph, David, Samuel.  All the Old Testament heroes of faith were there. But I cannot recall ever seeing a book on the woman who has become my favorite Old Testament giant of faith:  Rahab the harlot. The NIV offers the possibility that Rahab may have been an innkeeper rather than a prostitute in the footnotes, but the King James Version is blunt, to the point, and offers no alternative.  Regardless of the descriptor, God did not allow Rahab’s sin history to keep her from a redeemed future.

  • God knew exactly the kind of “innkeeper” Rahab was and He chose to offer her love.
  • Rahab knew exactly who she was and she chose to believe He loved her enough to save her.

Her choice to trust God protected her family, altered the face of the Israelite Nation, and directly touches your life today.  Still, though her influence is far reaching, after Joshua 6, we don’t find the name Rahab in the Old Testament again.  But Girlfriend,  don’t think for a moment that Rahab doesn’t cross the Covenant line.  She not only crosses it, she comes over with a roar!

Even though the author of my beloved children’s books might not have been able to find an appropriate way to celebrate her among the heroes of faith, the Author of our faith did.  He made certain that the Apostle Paul listed her right after Moses and before Gideon, Samuel, and David in the “Hall of Faith,” Hebrews 11.  She’s not only commended as one who believed and was saved, she is also included in the Book of James as one who was counted righteous because she acted on her faith. So Rahab stretches from the Old to the New Testament as an example of God’s saving grace and a life of faith throughout the generations.  Now what of the inheritance kept in heaven for us that will never spoil, perish or fade that I mentioned earlier?  What proof do we have of that?  Well, I believe that the answer to that is found in the very first chapter of the New Testament.  Matthew begins his account with the genealogy of Jesus Christ the Messiah and  tucked quietly in at verse 1:5 we find Rahab.  Rahab, fully redeemed, fully grafted into the vine of the chosen of God, completed the family tree that bore the Messiah.  Rahab  was the great-great- . . . . .grandmother of Jesus Christ.

Now that might be something you have considered, but have you ever let your mind go to the next step, to the beyond what we can conceive or imagine?  Think about this.  Rahab would have departed this planet long before the Messiah was born.  She would’ve learned who The Branch in her family tree was straight from the mouth of God.  What would she have done as she heard the Father say, “Rahab, I am sending the Messiah.  He will be the Light of the world.  He will redeem the generations and bring my children home.  And Rahab . . the One who is Redemption will be your great-great…grandson.”  Beloved, try to stand in Rahab’s shoes as the words washed over her heart.  Do you think her eyes drew open wide as her mind tried to comprehend it?  Did her hand cover her mouth as it fell open and the truth of it settled on her soul?  Did she begin to weep as understanding dawned in her heart? I don’t know how or if she remained upright, but I hope I get the chance to ask her someday.  And I hope I get the chance to thank her and let her know how much it has meant to me to have someone “like her” walk before someone “like me.”

Rahab the harlot, who lived long before me, is how I know that God loves me regardless of my sin history.  Rahab the called, who chose to trust God to preserve her life, is how I know He works for the good of those who love Him.  Rahab, the redeemed, who had no idea what awaited her in Glory is how I know that my mind cannot conceive the goodness.

So, there it is.  God being God.  He who was, He who is, and He who is to come.  He is faithful to Himself.  All of those words, all of that verbosity,–more than a paragraph past the end of the comment column– just to come full circle and find that our God does not change.

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God is Resolved to Speak My Language . . .and Yours

4 Feb

I have made much of God’s faithfulness to Himself in these first few posts because God has made much of His faithfulness to Himself to me over the last year and a half.  Really, God has been preparing my heart to begin grabbing hold of that foundational truth forever.  That’s one of the wonderful things about Him.  He doesn’t care how thick-headed or dull you are, He’ll just keep repeating Himself until He sees the flame of comprehension begin to flicker.

I have to tell you that as I wrote that last sentence I felt a smile spread across my face because I had never realized before that “thick-headed” is my love language.  Let me explain.  The thing that God uses, more than anything else, to romance my soul and woo my heart is the revelation of the connections that flow between the Old and the New Testament.  I love it when He says the same thing on both sides of the Covenant line — when He repeats Himself.  Nothing, absolutely nothing, thrills my heart more than having His Word come to life that way. Nothing makes my heart, my mind, and my soul stand up and praise in such complete adoration. In that moment, my spirit knows what God meant when He told us that His words are life.

Since “thick-headed” might not be your love language, let me give you an example of what I mean. I won’t be able to describe the whole process to you or explain exactly the way God leads me from thing to thing, but I think I can give you enough so you understand just how sweet He is when He peels back the temporal and gives me these small glimpses—which are enormous for this everyday woman– of His glory.

So this is how it often unfolds for me, just change the place in the Bible I am reading and the thing that catches my eye.  I open my Bible and read Genesis 3.  My eye catches on the fact that part of the curse/consequence of sin is the land producing thorns.  The Holy Spirit nudges me to wonder, “Do you think it’s possible thorns are linked to or symbolic of sin throughout the Scripture?”  I haul out my Strong’s concordance or go to Biblegateway and search for the different Scriptures that have the word “thorn” in them. God has used that process to start my train of thought chugging down tracks, with the destination unknown, time and time again.  That particular time, it played out like this:

 Genesis 3:18

To Adam he said, “Because you listened to your wife and ate from the tree about which I commanded you, ‘You must not eat of it,’ “Cursed is the ground because of you; through painful toil you will eat of it all the days of your life.  It will produce thorns and thistles for you, and you will eat the plants of the field.

The Problem: Thorns symbolize the curse

    • Thorns were birthed by sin.
    • They are the consequence/by product of sin and man will toil to be free of them
    • The land has no choice but to produce them.

Isaiah 10:17

The Light of Israel will become a fire, their Holy One a flame; in a single day it will burn and consume his thorns and his briers.

The Promise:  The curse will be consumed.

    • A Savior — the Light of Israel — will come
    • Sin will be consumed by the Savior 

Matthew 27:27-31 (Mark 15:16-20; John 19:2-5)

Then the governor’s soldiers took Jesus into the Praetorium and gathered the whole company of soldiers around him. They stripped him and put a scarlet robe on him, and then twisted together a crown of thorns and set it on his head. They put a staff in his right hand and knelt in front of him and mocked him. “Hail, king of the Jews!” they said. They spit on him, and took the staff and struck him on the head again and again. After they had mocked him, they took off the robe and put his own clothes on him. Then they led him away to crucify him.

The Person:  Christ wore the thorns/curse.

Choo!  Choo!  We have arrived and the view is beautiful.   The thorns birthed by the curse in the opening chapters of Genesis have been overcome by the birth of redemption when our Jesus became the curse for us.  He himself bore our sins in his body on the tree, so that we might die to sins and live for righteousness and by his wounds we have been set free.  No longer are we held captive and forced to produce “thorns and thistles” we may now produce a crop that is fruitful and receive the blessing of God.   See the wonder of it.  Feel the overwhelming sense of Him.  God, who does not change (Malachi 3:6), leaves nothing unfinished.  Everything comes to fruition in the Son, who is the same yesterday, today, and forever (Hebrews 13:8).  Choo!  Choo!

Now, you might be sitting there beside the tracks thinking, Bunny that does not trip my trigger at all.  I heard the whistle sound in the distance and it isn’t that I don’t find it nice, but to say it thrills me might be a little strong.  Well, take heart Sister, because while I might be dumbfounded that it doesn’t take you straight to the Holy of Holies, the One who matters is not!  He knows what you need to hear and He planned before time began to speak straight to your heart.  Do you really think He wouldn’t shout the “All Aboard” in your direction?

I have a beautiful Sister in Christ who indulges me all the time as I ramble on about the things God is showing me.  And she is sooo thrilled . . . for me.   Because at the end of the day, God says it, she reads it, it’s true.  End of story.  She doesn’t have the compulsion to know every detail.  That is not the language of her soul.  She loves to hear me talk about it.  She loves His truth.  But what stirs her heart is when you put that truth to music.  Music is the thing that leads her to that place of complete immersion and adoration.  And isn’t it just like God that He gifted her with song so they speak the same language fluently.

Not so long ago this sweet friend was struggling with some serious health issues.  The symptoms she had been experiencing could’ve pointed toward some very dire neurological diagnosis. A series of tests were ordered and as the day for their completion drew near we earnestly prayed that God would bless her with peace and a calm heart.  She arrived for her tests and entered the unfamiliar building with a heart full of confidence that God would be with her every step of the way.  And that same heart thought of her two kids and her husband and what God might call them all to walk through.  But true to His Word, her God did not leave her for a moment.  No, her God was right there preparing to sing a love song just for her.  After signing in, an older gentleman approached her in his volunteer vest and explained that he would be escorting her to the testing location.  She gathered her things and began to walk at his side.  As they journeyed down that corridor, with her heart full of her family, the old gentleman began to sing, “I’ve got peace like a river, I’ve got peace like a river, I’ve got peace like a river in my soul . . . “  And she did.  Because the God of the Universe, the Lover of her soul, bent down low and whispered in her ear.  She had heard, in the voice of that old gentleman, the truth of God.

“The Lord your God is with you,
he is mighty to save.
He will take great delight in you,
he will quiet you with his love,
he will rejoice over you with singing.”

Zephaniah 3:17

Dear One, never doubt for a moment that the Creator of communication is fluent in the language of your unique soul.  To her who has an ear, let her hear.

thSide Note 1: My sweet Sister has recovered in full and continues to sing in worship and praise to the One who has saved her.

Side Note 2:  (Read this part in a whisper so no one knows that I couldn’t end without telling you just a thing or two more) –I have the paper in front of me that has all the verses I looked up that particular day and it’s long.  It wasn’t what we needed for this example but I have to tell you I am totally agonizing about not painting the whole picture so please, when you have the time go to Numbers 33:55 because you’ll find out there that sin hurts if you hang out with it.  If you go to Judges 9 you’ll see what you give up if you not only allow it but actually ask it to rule over you.  And Ezekiel 2:6  is where we discover that even though sin and rebellion surround us we need not fear. And then in the New Testament read the Parable of the Sower in  Matthew 13, Mark 4, and Luke 8 because we need to know that sin can choke us to death.  All aboard!!

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The Resolve To Love – – Without an Asterisk

31 Jan

I felt a little sheepish when I read back over the last post in preparation for this one and realized I hadn’t clearly stated that marrying Brett and the privilege of being Miss Britt’s Momma were definitely my biggest blessings.  I’m hoping that the sentiment was a given and needed no explanation, but just in case — Biddinger Duo, I love you so and I give thanks for the very good gifts you are each day.

Even though I love the Dynamic Duo with all my heart, and from the seat I now occupy in time can honestly say “I wouldn’t change a thing,” I would be less than honest if I didn’t confess that my life has taken some turns that I did not expect when I said “I do.” If you’re married, I bet the same is true for you.  If you’re single, honey, it will be.  Not many of us, when we get married and say “for richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health, for better or for worse,” have any clue what we’re saying.

Just imagine if we actually comprehended the commitment we were making as we exchanged vows.  And do you Marilyn, promise to love and cherish Brett even when you are celebrating your 5th anniversary and realize he still hasn’t learned to read your mind?  Do you promise to honor and partner with him in the pursuit of your dreams when after having been married 10 years he still drives too fast and rides the cars in front of him?  And will you love him above all others when he insists you buy a dryer without seeing it in person and it melts all your favorite socks?

Lest we think all the future revelations are for the bride, I’m certain most grooms have no idea what is in store for them when romance meets reality.  Poor Brett.  I’m so certain he did not sign up for toothbrushes slathered with dripping white goo, eyebrow hair sculptures in the sink, or “winter legs.”  And Girlfriend, if you’re from Michigan or any place cold weather sets in, you know what I am talking about there.

I think it’s probably best that we don’t stare straight into the face of real life and see our spouses-to-be without at least a hint of rose colored glasses prior to our marriage. Imagine if Brett had looked at the ankle bones above my lace covered wedding shoes and seen the shadow of the coming winter.  We did get married in September so if it hadn’t been a special occasion . . . . . I’m just sayin.

Picture what might happen if we knew the unsanded, ungroomed truth looming just the other side of the honeymoon?  How many of us would stand firm in our desire to be together until “death do us part” if we knew in advance about the hair sculptures in the not-so-distant future or the melted socks on the horizon?  Might we decide that dealing with the imperfections and unmet expectations just wasn’t worth it?  Unfortunately, because I know the fickleness of my own heart, I can state with certainty that apart from Christ, my love is conditional at best and self-centered at worst.

Unlike the unfailing love that I have received from my faithful God and Savior, my love comes with an asterisk –*until my expectations aren’t met.  And my asterisk love is not limited to my husband; it extends to my Divine Bridegroom as well.  Can you imagine the God who is jealous for me (Exodus 34:14) offering all that He is to keep my heart safe, secure, and wanting me to be devoted solely unto Him being met with:  “I will love only you if ___________.”?  Your fill-in-the-blank might be different than mine but we can easily come up with some general answers to paint a pretty good picture of the things that steal our attention and our affection.  Might the “I LOVE YOU” we profess be more accurate this way:     I love you.*

* if my children are happy and content.

* if I am successful and happy in my job.

* if I have a nice home and money in the bank.

* if I do not experience pain—physical or emotional.

I might not have hit on yours, but I bet you know without a lot of thought what comes after your asterisk.

Here’s the thing.  God doesn’t tell us to love only Him because it does a thing for Him. Remember, regardless of who or how I am God has always been, is today, and will continue to be perfect (Malachi 3:6; Hebrews 13:8).  He needs nothing from me (Acts 17:25).  He has no unmet inner need.  It really took me a long time to get over the notion (I pray you aren’t offended by this and ask you to stick with me on it) that God was a “glory hound.”  I had this warped picture of a red-eyed God with a lightning bolt in the sky demanding that all eyes and all hearts be focused on Him.  I had no idea that an undivided heart served me – not Him.

That’s right. His desire for my heart to be undivided, to love Him with no asterisks, serves only me.  Because only when my eyes and my heart are fully pursuing the God who is Unfailing Love can I hope to  begin to love others.  It is His love living in me that reaches beyond my human limitations and loves my husband, my child, my friends, and my enemies.  When I am firmly determined to love Him with everything I am, when I am resolved to be filled with His Spirit –no asterisks involved—I will live life to the full.  I will possess life beyond my wildest imagination when I live, move and have my being in Him (Acts 17:28).  This is not only the future inheritance He has set aside for me (1 Peter 1:3-6).  It’s the asterisk free living He calls me to now.

Sisters, the Beautiful One has declared that He is enthralled with your beauty (Psalm 45:11).  He promises that His great love toward you will stand firm forever and that His faithfulness was established in Heaven Itself (Psalm 89:2).  He takes great delight in you and rejoices over you with singing (Zephaniah 3:17)–and doesn’t your heart just know that it’s a love song.   Yes, the One who is Love has chosen you to be His beloved and based on the authority of His Word, I guarantee that you can search the pages of your Bible from now until the end of our age and  . . . . . you will never find an asterisk.

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